'Hey quiet, this is not a rock concert alright?"

Ok, I know this might be old, but I can't help but laugh at the stupidity of hockey players sometimes.

Here's Joffrey Lupul, who by the way is doing MUCH better this year in Philly out of sulky Edmonton.

And my Habs lose again, please not another downhill slide like last year, my heart condition is wobbly enough as it is.

But hey, at least my Habs didn't get pummled by the Yotes like the Leafers did tonight, hehe.

-BBeR

Canadiens...is the city really hockey?

An article published on the French version of Canoe has me a little troubled and perplexed at the moment.

What it basically states is that the Canadiens, le Tricolore, les Glorieux, 24 time Stanley Cup Champs, whatever you wanna call them, are overrated when it comes to their popularity around Montreal and Quebec.

The article specifically quotes like this:
"If you think that the Canadiens are as important in Montrealers' eyes as the Red Sox are for Bostonians or the Yankees for New Yorkers, you are sadly mistaken..."

It claims that, according to a study/survey done by Turnkey Sports and Entertainment, Montreal finishes a lowly 74th out of 122 sports cities in North America when it comes to exposure in their local area.
"Exposure" here meaning "being a fan" or "who really cares about the Habs", in short, the real "fans".

The Habs media group has been using the phrase "The City is Hockey", "La Ville est Hockey" as the Habs slogan, and I gotta admit, it's quite appealing, appeasing and thankful to hear as a fan, as I truly believed our city was hockey, but this newfound report, like I said, has troubled me.

Aren't the Habs supposed to be hockey's bread and butter? The greatest sports franchise to arguably exist?
The winningnest franchise in NHL and sports history? A city where people are hockey-crazy and hockeylific?

The study shows that the Sabres (4th overall); Red Wings (20th) and Penguins (30th) are the top 3 NHL teams in North America.

The Canadiens?

A very surprising finish at 74th, or 15th in the NHL rankings.

I find this extremely hard to swallow, both as a Habs fan and person.
There is no doubt in my mind that Turnkey did not ask Francophones what they though about hockey in Montreal, where it stands for them, but rather the less, but equally fanatic Anglophone side.
I don't want to start any language wars here, but seriously, to think that Turnkey probably didn't get a French speaking surveyor to communicate with the larger population of Montreal, the Francs is insanely absurd!

So if Turnkey did ask them what they thought of the Habs, they'd probably and almost certainly be a lot higher on this list.
When asked "but they sell out every game", Haynes Hendrickson (VP of Turnkey) simply answered it's not about selling out, it's whether or not people go to the Bell Centre to see the Habs or the opposing team.

Jesus Almighty.

End of story right there, the City is hockey, period, point final, that was really the final nail in the coffin for me to mark this "revelation" as understudied, ignorant and certainly illogical.

The Canadiens...the best team ever in the history of hockey, les Glorieux, 24 time Stanley Cup Champs, le Tricolore...74th?!

You must be joking Mr Hendrickson,

GO HABS GO!

-BBeR

Candy for a baby...the day BBeR went gaga over tickets!

Alright, what you're about to read/see is only worth your time if you understand the fact that people here in Montreal feel great when they manage to net tickets for TEN Canadiens games for the upcoming season that fit into their budget; especially when these tickets sell out with 10 minutes.

So, think of this post as a storybook with lots of pictures.
(Some of my personal info as well as my ticket information has been blurred out -you have no idea how huge counterfeiting tickets are in this town-)

Home from a long day, BBeR opens up his mailbox and pulls this envelope out.

"Wow, this is Xpressmail", said the baffled BBeR, who was only used to getting bills, bills and hatred mail from (mainly CHEAP) Leafs fans around the country.
The bewildered Habanatic was being sarcastic, since he could tell pefectly well by the weight and odour what the envelope contained...

He then proceeded to feverishly tear it open...

...revealing a small envelope emblazoned with the Bell Centre logo...

All it took was a little peek inside to get BBeR's heart rate going...

"TICKETS! TICKETS! TICKETS!"

10 minutes later, after a series of really weird behavior, your blogger returned to his lair, and amused himself by taking pictures of his tickets in various angles...

First, he set them flat on his desk

In the rocking words of Pink Floyd:
"Grab that cash with both hands and make a stash"

In this case...tickets.

Aerial view...

In his grasp...




What more needs to be said?
BBeR truly is a whacked out guy with nothing better to do than take pictures of his tickets.

Oh man, I can't wait to read the comments for this one! ;)

-BBeR

Say that again...Coyotes sign...David Aebischer?!

Usually I will think of a logical solution for every team's UFA signing, but sorry folks, certainly not this time around!

The Coyotes today picked up former Canadiens goaltender David Aebischer off the free-agent front, signing the "crappy" Swiss goalie to a 1-year contract worth a thrifty $600,000

You read the vulgarity right, and Habs fans know that all too well.

I don't understand why a goalie like David Aebsicher would be of logical interest to any general manager in the game at this point in his career.

Surely the 'Yotes could've done better than a 3.57 GAA and a .885 SPCT after the all-star break.
This is the same goaltender who was expected to be a decent 1B goalie and step up when needed.

Well, he was needed, in late February, Montreal starter Cristobal Huet suffered a pulled hamstring and would be out an entire two months, thus making Aebischer the undisputed no.1 goalie during his absence.
So how did this all turn out for our good friend?

Well, he didn't step up like the team needed him to do...so you guessed it, he sucked.
He sucked so bad, that my blood pressure would rise every single time a crappy goal would go in.

At one point, the scouting report opposing teams had on Aebischer was simple...shoot anywhere and you will score.
The team ultimately missed the playoffs and one could argue Aebischer's horrible play in the second half was the main reason.
Even in his backup role down in Hamilton, Bulldogs' goaltender Yann Danis could've performed a hell of a lot better than the Swiss stopper.

I just don't get what was the problem with bringing up Cornell University star David LeNeveu from down in San Antonio?

Exactly, nothing, useless signing, wasted money.

And David isn't too bright either, accepting a backup/1B role on a shaky NHL team with his reputation as a stopper at an all time low while he could've easily signed on with a European team and earned a better living as a no.1 goalie.

This is Aebischer's last good chance to prove he has something left, as he'll likely battle for the starter's role with Swede Mikael Tellqvist.
In 2006, Canadiens GM Bob Gainey pulled off a shocker, dumping the struggling and the troubled Jose Theodore to the Colorado Avalanche in exchange for David Aebischer.

Despite his poor numbers with Montreal, Gainey swung a deal that is still being hailed as a steal in the Canadiens' favour, as Habs fans happily watch the miserable Jose Theodore ride the pine at an expensive $6.5 million down in Colorado.

And to this day, I am grateful for this deal, so long Abby, you will not be missed!

--BBR

The REAL Crosby...

I couldn't resist, Martin Biron says it best, Sidney Crosby is a LIAR and a WHINER.



You rock Marty, man, Sabres fans must really miss you!

--BBR

And...save by Chris Dury, what a stop with the glove hand!

You read the title right, Chris Drury is now stopping pucks.

And this is how the Buffalo Sabres are supposed to improve their powerplay, and likely, their morale heading into Game 4 of the Eastern Conference Final tonight.

So is Derek Roy

And Nathan Paestch

Oh, let's not forget Brian Campbell too

Miller looks on, wondering if his Sabres can pull off a "Red Sox" miracle.

Sorry fellows, I don't think you'll be any better than Ryan Miller soon.

--BBR

Breaking news! Evil woman evil no more! The story on why she loves the Habs! EXTRA! EXTRA!

This just changed my life, an enemy from the other battlecamp changed grounds this morning and has united in mortal kombat to defeat the enemies of the Northeast and beyond with the sacred and beloved Montreal Canadiens.

Got ya, didn't I?

But really, she was *oh no!* forced *oh no!* to write this because she lost by a measly 10 points to Matt in the hockey blogger playoff pool.

[...]"Matthew is evil".

Rule number one:
Leafs fans= evil evil evil evil evil evil evil evil evil evil evil evil evil evil evil
Sens fans= evil evil
Habs fans= want to take you out to dinner


Dear Habs,
So...how's it going on the other side of the border, eh? I guess you're pretty cool. I mean "Habbies" even sounds pretty cute.

No woman! We're Habs, as in "Habitants", as in les Canadiens!
Pfft, not Habbies, do you think we're running a teddy bear joint for girls under 4 years old here or something?

Like a cat.
Only if its fur is bleeding bleu, blanc et rouge!

Well, my friend told me the story of how her Aunt's cat was very fidgety and liked to kick things and she was nicknamed "Kung-fu Kitty" and the first connection I made in my head was "Saku Koivu sounds like a Kung-Fu move", ergo....I am going to name my cat Saku Koivu.

Slow down there woman!
Koivu, SAKU KOIVU, a kung-fu fighter? At least make him a kick boxer, cause he's a Finn, c'mon, he's no Jet Li!
And besides, a puny house cat is a weak creature. I see you like cats, how about a big cat?
Why don't you name your new pet lion I'm sending in the mail Saku Koivu?
Or is that too tame?
Ah! I know, my piranha headed, tiger feeted monster would be perfect!
Please inform me as I'm going to package it and send it to you soon!

8. Sheldon Souray's tendency to break his stick was the inspiration for my first ever HNIC drinking game.

The stick breaking was all-planned, you didn't hear?
No! Some evil master minded Sens fans infiltrated Souray's entire stick collection constantly last year so the Habs couldn't win, because some greedy Sens fan (apparently, how interesting, she's a woman!) would rather watch Souray's allegedly awesome body move around from the ice-level and turn towards where his stick broke just so she can get a glimpse of...sigh.
And apparently, she would sit in the same spot game in and game out not caring what the game was all about, just to obssesively observe the one man she desired.
She counted how many times his sticks broke and had a drink for each one at the local bar.

10. [...]You're also one of the few teams that still have to pay a land tax for your arena. Sorry about that.

Ah yes, but in return for the land tax, we actually get a good crowd, probably the best in all of hockey, maybe in all of sports.
And whatyou looking at? Don't you think those Scotiabankers would like it better if the seats were filled 100 straight games, and not just for the playoffs?
The million fan question: would you pay a land tax to get all the Sens fans to come every single game?

2. You're not the Leafs.
Good thinking! I wonder who is dumb enough to mix up a crappy, whiny, baby, Bobcolie blue and white team with a...*dives to his feet* honourable, hard-working, fighting, ActuallyHaveMoreThanOneStanleyCupInlast40years-ing team?

But really, this all is a joke!
Sherry, you did a good job, I just hope for your sake CapsChick doesn't read this (already emailing it to her! :D )and you won't have to redo it!

I'm not that bad of a blogger...mouuuhhouhahaa, am I?

Good morning.

Kasparaitis? Could be something you picked up in the urinal at the Garden...

You know, this can be perceived as funny or as insulting.
I still don't know where I stand...

10. Saku Koivu
Pronounced: Sack-Ooo Koy-VuuC'mon, Mr. and Mrs. Koivu. That's just not fair, especially since he's going to be playing in Canada, where people end every word with an up-lilt anyway.

9. Jarkko Ruutu
Pronounced: Yar-Ko Roo-TooFun Fact: All of the world's unused vowels eventually find their way to Finland, where they are recycled into names.

8. Guillaume Latendresse
Pronounced: Gee-Ulm La-Ten-DressYou know you have trouble when you play in the heart of Quebec and your name still makes the announcers tongue-tied.

7. Petteri Nokelainen
Pronounced: Pet-Ter-Ee Noke-El-Eye-Nen
Could be a forward for the New York Islanders, could be an artificial additive in that ice cream you're eating. Who knows? And that's why it's fun.

6. Ramzi Abid
Pronounced: Ram-Zee Ah-Beed
His name may not be the funniest on the list, but his nickname is awesome. Before each team flight, his teammates and security personnel call him "Random Search."

5. Jordin Tootoo
Pronounced: Jor-den Too-Too
If he had been a ballet dancer, this would have been doubly hilarious. But J.T. seems to be in on the joke—he wears number 22 (get it?)

4. Jonathan Cheechoo
Pronounced: Jon-a-Thon Chee-Choo
Just edging out close name rival Tootoo, Jonathan gets the extra vote because if you say his last name several times really fast, it sounds like a train.

3. Darius Kasparaitis
Pronounced: Dar-Ee-Us Kas-Per-Eye-Tus
Could be a defenseman for the New York Rangers, could be something you picked up in the urinal at the Garden. Who knows? And that's why it's fun.

2. Yutaka Fukufuji
Pronounced: You-Tak-A Fook-U-Foo-Jee
The first Japanese player to ever play an NHL game, Yutaka's surname dates back to the time his great-great-grandfather told off his arrogant neighbor, Mr. Fuji.

1. Miroslav Satan
Pronounced: Meer-O-Slav Shah-Tan
It doesn't matter how it's pronounced, if this guy gets traded to New Jersey, it's one of the signs of the Apocalypse.

Shake it Hollweg!

Wow, this is hilarious, it came out about 2 days ago and it's well worth watching!

Looks like that Simon hit altered nothing in Hollweg at all...